How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

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What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

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Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

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PENlS.

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

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A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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