- Anti Joke

I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

knock knock how there me ok come in

knock knock who's there police

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

What did the asian parent say to his kid when he got a D? -It's OK son, you will do better next time.

what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

why did the chicken cross the road? There was a depletion of its natrual habitat due to deforistation and it was searching for a new home.

three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

Why do you believe in evolution? Because it increases the power of my pokemon.

What's brown and sticky? 'Brown' is a colour, and 'sticky' is a consistency. Please try and use correct grammar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

HAPPY NOVEMBER 2

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***