What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

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What is large white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A refridgerator

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A genie came out of a lamp explain?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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Women's football

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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