How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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knock knock your gay

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What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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why did the chicken cross the road Why not

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

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what time is it rape time

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Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops