My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

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Nickelback.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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Please don't rape me.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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2

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a

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Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Penis in a box.

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whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

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Penis jokes.

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops