why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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