So a baby seal walks into a club.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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