Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

knock knock come in

Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

Why did the man die? A fridge fell on him.

What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

Fox News

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

Face...the other white meat!

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

have safe sex

Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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