You were born.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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im @ work, LOL.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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Penis chickens

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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