what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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Why did the black guy punch the white guy? They were both professional boxers.

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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hey hey apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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