why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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pobody's nerfect

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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whats long and black? a baton

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Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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Wanna hear a dead baby joke? Of course you don't. they're sick and disgusting and enjoyment of one merits only the deepest of society's hatred and scorn.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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A man walks into a bar He is now in the emergency room suffering from deep lacerations to the forehead as well as a bloody nose.

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Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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NEVER

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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