What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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What is purple and rhymes with apple? Nothing

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded at sea,the brunette swims 1 quarter of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns.The redhead swims 3 quarters of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims half the way to shore, gets tired and swims back.

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Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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