a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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John Cena for president

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops