Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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Feminism.

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What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

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If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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