An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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why did the old lady come home late? she got raped.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

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did you hear about the argument between jamie jacob and dylan? daniel killed them all

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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