Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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im telling maguire

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

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why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

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Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

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There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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Long joke Your such a downey

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- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

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A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops