hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Llamaworm

Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

So you have been really stressed lately huh?

What does the fox say? "It's called a hustle, sweetheart."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

the bible

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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