Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

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What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

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Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

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Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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What's worse than a paper-cut? Two paper-cuts. What's worse than two paper-cuts? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three paper-cuts.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops