Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry Show me your tits

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

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What did the black man say to his wife on valentines day? - You are fat

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops