Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT TRUCK! What truck? Weird I could have sworn I saw a truck...

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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want to hear a cat joke? i'm just kitten....

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Arrow in the Knee!

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Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

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your mama is so stupid stole a free sample

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"I think your a hoe" "Don't worry, I know I am!" "You wanna F*** me?" "Hell Ya!"

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What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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I grunt when I poop.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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