all your base are belong to mark

what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He prefers to bench press.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

Knock Knock. Come in.

Q: What did the schizophrenic man say to his father? A: "Every time grandmother's urn shrieks, this pornography turns to black ink."

An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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