Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke in anti-joke? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monekey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the girl fall of of her bike? She was hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did the blind man see? Nothing he felt the penis in his butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

thumb_up thumb_down -6

i had sex i stuck my dick into your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops