Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

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Hello! Echo! My name is Ed!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

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What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

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Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

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Beka has AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops