How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

a man said hi.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

Teacher- And that is why the Pythagorean theorem only works for RIGHT triangles. Any questions? Student- I like grapes.

What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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