Religious fanatics: WE MUST NOT SIN! Jesus: And I died for their sins? They do not even try a bit of sex and rock and roll? Now that is a sin :( I died for nothing then :( Religious fanatics: Damn!

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? - Getting killed in the Holocaust. Whats worse than that? - Nothing.

What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

How does a printer work? You plug it in.

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

Look whos talking Matt Critchley

This is a sentence. This is also a senctence.

Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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