What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's better then a bad anti joke? A Good anti joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

thumb_up thumb_down -26

guess what>? your mum lol

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops