Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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Two Eskimos are in a bath tub. One says pass the soap. The other says no soap; radio.

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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your mother is so obese, that she really should look into eating a well balanced diet and taking part in an excercise plan that suits her

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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Roses are red Violets are blue Buttercups are yellow Thats about it

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Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

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ask me if im a door yes

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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