Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

What happens when u poke a ghost that is standing on the edge of a building? Ghost aren't real so therefor u will fall of the edge and die

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

What's worse than bombs? Nukes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

all your base are belong to mark

Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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