How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

FUS RO DAH!!!

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

all your base are belong to mark

What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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