Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

Gay marriage is freaking gay.

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

White NBA players.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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