a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a blond makes out with ron every sunday and she stops every time to remember that she put the cheese in the wrong compartment brick house cheese is sad!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? A Ferrari was never alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You all have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the black man say when he waked into KFC? Can I use the restroom?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops