Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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