A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

It's The Only Crayon The illustrator had?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Japanese study of the stereotypical American man: Murica: Come on come on! Japanese: Uh yes? *walks toward American* Murica: Are you okay?! Japanese: Well yes I am doi.. Murica: BUSTER WOLF *Punches Japanese which smacks into the ground critically wounded. Murican: OKAAAAAAAAAAAY! *throws dirty trucker cap at Japanese man and leaves.* BEWARE OF THE TYPICAL AMERICAN! Study 2 American man, taught Japanese Discipline: Japanese: Herrow Mr.Educated American *bows* "Japanesed Murican": *Fighting Pose* " I SHALL STAIN MY HANDS, WITH YOUR BLOOD!" *Japanese people run away* Experiment fail. BEWARE EXTREMELY OF AMERICAN MAN! Nero: Nuking Japan probably created a few controversies and wrong stereotypes... After visiting the US several times, I find these manners to be of the Texan stereotype though... Educated Murican: PREDICTABO!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -16

One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Racial Equality

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how many terminaly ill 5 year old cancer patients does it take to burn to supply enough energy to make toast just 4.5 :)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I was raped oh no he's coming HELP ahhhhhhhhfkaek.k.k.k.k.k.k. vmruieao3 vxm v

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops