What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

A priest, rabbi, and a monk are sitting on a plane. One is in first class, one is in business class, and one is in coach. It turns out they're all going to the same interfaith conference.

French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

A dog was barking at a tree

What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

Ryan Maharaj is INDIAN!

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What do you do in a one night stand? Stand all night long.

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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