I got bored today and decided to surf the web. Thank you for reading this

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

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Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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what did john boner say to the hor that was jewing his laundry want to sex my motherss twat?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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What's funny about a dying dog? Nothing.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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