what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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Women's Rights.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? She was dead

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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