Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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these are shit

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Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

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KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

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When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops