- Anti Joke

Q: What did Albert Einstein say to Adolf Hitler? A: They never talked. And if Albert Einstein did say something to Adolf Hitler, he would have died first.

What do you call a car that doesn't work? Broken.

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

If Tiger Woods is Asian and Black what is he? A golfer!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

Punching a baby

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

roses are red violets are twisted turn around bitch your about to get fisted

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.