New mission: refuse this mission

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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why did the physics major drop out of college? because he stumbled onto a finding that made him contemplate life so much that he needed to go to africa to study where the source of the finding where he later caught AIDS from an infected village person, he was later flown back to the US where he was cured out of a miracle but later hanged himself because he was not allowed to go back to africa and find out the meaning of life.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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What do you call an Arabic man flying a plane? A Pilot.

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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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