30cm = 0,3meters

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

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Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Knock Knock. Knockin on Heavens door, oh hey come in

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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A man was shot. He died.

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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