Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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Why are black people good at basketball? While there are many preternaturally gifted black men and women in professional basketball, the notion that one race holds sway over the others in terms of sheer skill and talent is a ridiculous stereotype; propagated, no doubt, by both ignorant and jealous persons of other colors.

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human centipede

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Radical thinkers have decided to end abortion they will begin to kill everyone who has an abortion.

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How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

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Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

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think twice or at least think

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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My three children are three big mistakes.

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Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Whats funnier than 24, 69

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why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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