Whats white? A fridge

Woman rights.

Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

What's worse than a baby falling? A baby fall in a pit of tar What did the baby say on the way down? "weeeeeee"

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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