What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

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Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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What do you get when you eat a bag of potatoes? The're all gone.

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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#IHateHashtags

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

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What did the blind man say to the train conductor? Nothing. He was mute too.

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

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What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

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Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops