What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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roses are red violets are blue grass is green

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

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HURT

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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How did the dog die? He was put down.

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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What's three times as dangerous than a war? Three wars.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

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Yock

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What do you do when you see a black man limping in your yard? You invite him inside, ask him what happened, and possibly call an ambulance if, God forbid, the situation is that serious.

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Knock knock Who's there ... Hello? Is there anyone there? (In the bushes) Ha! He'll never suspect us!

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what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

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Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops