What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

I have a meeting with a man about a horse. I have a chance to win the triple crown. Barboro is gonna do awesome. Oh wait he is dead.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

Andrew's a bald wankstain.

Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

You are being like super pervert now, I would never ever even try weed, cocaine is the real deal, you know I do not mean that. Anyway does it work on everyone?

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

have you ever had african food? neither have they

Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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