Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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bees knees

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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what is blue and fluffy, a blue fluff. what is red and fluffy, a polar bear wiped in red paint. you probably should not have done that because now the polar bear is chasing after you.

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in soviet russia, cow milks you

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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What did one say to the other woman? I have a penis

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Seven

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what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

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what do you order when it's a sunday in nyc during a solar eclipse on a leap year past 12:00 pm? what ever you like

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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Why was the blonde in the library? Because she was committed to her studies and was getting ready for a test.

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A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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Bruce Forsith's energy and charisma.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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BIM slowly fucks old women in the dark so they think its rape then he slips his hand up there ass and rips out there heart

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how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops