How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

What do you call a cat with no tail? A Manx cat

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

soccer

so the weather's nice...

what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

nick ya honkin of b.o m8

"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

Why did greg come to America? Because he wanted visit the states

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

What looks like a flower, smells like a flower, and feels like a flower, but isn't a flower? Just kidding it's a flower

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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