- Anti Joke

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

A Frenchman stays and fights

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.