Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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My bologna has a first name It's O-S-C-A-R... My bologna has a second name It's M-A-Y-E-R... Oscar and Mayer were the names of the pig and the cow that were slaughtered and subsequently processed into the bologna I am eating.

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What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

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What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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What did lady gaga call her grandpa? papaw razi. even wrote a song about him.

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what time is it? 3:16

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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What did the podiatrist say to the proctologist? That athletes foot fungus is clearing up nicely.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

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hey bill!

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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for keeps?

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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Ham sandwich

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops