What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your Mom's sooo fat that when she jumps into a pool her splash attack does damage :P

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

obama

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does a rock become when it falls into the red sea? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the deal with airline food?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's retarded and comes from Hulsberg? Roy Knubben

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Men, get on the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why couldn't the baby boy read the book? He had eye cancer and was therefore blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

there are rumors about monkeys liking bananas but that is a common misconception because if you take bananas divided by elephant times chalkboards you find that they like 0.9 lead from pencils that is aged from 1927

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Dubstep < Music

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock. Who's there? Salesmen. Does this smell like chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops